This weekend we're welcoming back the show that has the monopoly on lurid violence, epic battles, and wholly unnecessary nudity: Game of Thrones. George R.R. Martin's ability to describe the crunching of a skull is rivaled only by his ability to describe the crunching of a pastry, so it's only fitting that this sexy saga is home to some serious food porn. And revenge porn. And porn porn. I'm a main character in this show, so my life is decidedly in danger this week.



  • 7 ounces all purpose flour

  • 1 tsp kosher salt

  • 6 ounces unsalted butter, cold, cut into 1-inch pieces

  • 2-3 Tbsp ice water

  • 1 pound pork fat, finely diced

  • 1 medium spanish onion, diced

  • 2 Tbsp rolled oats

  • 1 Tbsp smoked paprika

  • 1 tsp paprika

  • 1 tsp allspice

  • 1 tsp freshly grated nutmeg

  • 1 cup heavy cream

  • 2 cups pig’s blood

  • 4 ounces goat’s cheese

  • 2 large figs, quartered


Makes one 9.5-inch pie

  1. In a food processor, pulse to combine flour and salt.  Add butter chunks, and pulse until the mixture resembles breadcrumbs.  Pour into a large bowl, and while folding with a spatula, sprinkle ice water over top, until a shaggy dough forms.  Pat out into a 5” wide disc, wrap in plastic wrap, and refrigerate at least an hour - up to overnight.

  2. In a high-walled frying pan, sauté pork fat until translucent, about 5 minutes.  Add onion and sweat for an additional 10 minutes, until onions are soft.  Remove from heat and allow to cool completely.

  3. Preheat oven to 350°F.  Remove pie dough from plastic wrap and pound out until it’s double its original width.  Begin to roll out the dough, making sure not to overwork it, until it’s about 1/8-inch thick.  Drape over a liberally-greased pie plate, and trim the edges as desired.  Line the bottom of the pie with parchment paper, weigh down with pie weights or dried beans and par-bake for 10 minutes, or until beginning to turn golden.  

  4. Add oats, smoked paprika, paprika, allspice, nutmeg, heavy cream, and blood to onion/fat mixture.  Mix well to combine, remove parchment paper and weights, and fill with blood mixture.  Bake for 20 minutes at 350°F, until pie just begins to set.  Top with goat cheese and figs, bake for an additional 10 minutes, and allow to cool for an hour before serving.