Bubble Bass is notorious in Bikini Bottom for three things: his hideous laugh, his pathological dishonesty, and his sophisticated palate for Krabby Patties. Follow along this week as we examine his soundboard of secret-menu jargon and take a crack at the almost-impossible-to-recreate patty melt - from the all-new BwB kitchen!



  • Onions
  • Texas toast
  • Pickles
  • Tomatoes
  • Salt
  • Iceberg lettuce
  • Caramelized onions
  • Ketchup
  • Mayonnaise
  • Garlic powder
  • Onion powder
  • Paprika
  • Pickle juice
  • Ground beef
  • Himalayan salt
  • Butter
  • Olive oil
  • Cheese (the fancier the better)

Method: Babish Version

  1. Start by prepping all of your ingredients. Slice your tomatoes, onions, lettuce and pickles. Set aside.
  2. Next, add olive oil to a pan and set to a medium high heat. Add a sliced onion and cook until caramelized. Take off pan and set aside.
  3. Add olive oil to pan and set to high heat. Roll out four 2-ounce balls of ground beef. Place on pan and press down with a metal spatula until flat. Top with Himalayan salt and paprika and cook for no longer than 30-45 seconds before flipping and topping with cheese of the fancy variety. Remove from pan and set aside.
  4. Add butter to a pan and grill your Texas Toast until just golden brown.
  5. In a separate bowl combine equal parts ketchup and mayonnaise with a sprinkle of garlic powder, onion powder, paprika, salt and 2 Tbsp of pickle juice.
  6. Build your melt by first placing a piece of Texas toast on the bottom followed by 4 patties with cheese, a slice of tomato, chopped iceberg lettuce, raw sliced onion, some sliced pickles, and some caramelized onions. Spread some of your ketchup mayonnaise sauce on the other piece of toast and place on top of the burger.